I wish that I could hug whoever made this.
the last time i reblogged this i got an angry anon.
let’s try this again, shall we?
wtf the fuck at all of these posts i’m seeing on my dash defending outright emotional manipulation and abuse in friendships/relationships in general.
if you are at a point in your relationship with someone where:
- they are openly (however passive aggressively) jealous about you spending time with people who aren’t them
- they demand your attention above everyone else’s, or above other things you have going on in your life
- they force you to fulfil a quota of communication with them every day, like communication with them is something you owe them instead of something that should com naturally for both of you
- you have to walk on eggshells around them to avoid making them angry at you
- they refuse to apologise for treating you badly becuase they ‘can’t help’ it
- you feel guilty doing things that aren’t talking to them in case it upsets them
- if you are generally interacting them out of a perceived obligation or fear of upsetting them rather than a genuine desire to speak to them
- A MULTITUDE of really unhealthy shit
that is not healthy. that is not a sign of a healthy friendship. stop defending this shit.
have you heard of bpd or hpd and have you ever thought that theyre mental illnesses and maybe you should help people through those problems instead of outright criticizing them. perhaps
no honestly fuck off with that shit please
I get what you’re saying, I do, but I think you’re grossly misunderstanding the original post.
The nature of someone’s mental or emotional condition can better explain why they might behave a certain way, but it STILL doesn’t excuse their behavior. Abuse can come from anyone, mentally ill or not, and no explanation for this abuse makes it ok.
Nobody is invalidating the fact that personality disorders and similar disorders effect the behavior of individuals that have them, and I certainly don’t think OP’s intention is to tell people to ignore the struggles they face.
I think OP’s point is that if you are in a relationship (of any degree; romantic, platonic, familial) where you feel unhappy, unsafe, used, etc., you have a full right to recognize unhealthy behavior when you experience it. You don’t have an obligation to stay by someone’s side if they mistreat you just because they struggle with a disability or disorder. Even if someone really, truly cannot control themselves, you should not feel guilty about leaving them for your own health and wellbeing.
Abuse is abuse, no matter who it comes from.
stop saying “his or her”
piss off prescriptivists
acknowledge nonbinary identities
make your sentences less clunky
advocate for common usage which is what leads to grammatical acceptance
Steve Maraboli, Unapologetically You: Reflections on Life and the Human Experience (via derikisu)
Keep this one in your back pocket for the next time someone acts like an ass and then tells you they’ve been through a lot of stuff. Respectful and yet still firmly keeping respect for yourself.
To donate £5 to the charity supporting the male victims of domestic abuse, text the message: MKDV46 to 70070
At first I though this was a joke
Don’t ignore this Tumblr
Yet they still do even when it’s right in their face.
This reminds me of how a friend of mine was abused by the mother of his child. She was mentally unstable and used to berate him constantly and would smack him in the head all the time. It really pissed me off. Then one night she threw hot coffee in his face and tried to stab him with a screwdriver. The cops hauled him off to jail because she made up a sob story that painted herself as the victim.
Once he left her, he stayed with me and it was a nightmare. She stalked him and me. She would drive by my house obsessively at all hours of the day and night (her muffler made a weird sound so I know it was her). She started showing up at my job, showing up at the places I frequented around town, and filling up my voicemail with dead air. The cops were no help.
One day she got bold enough to talk her way into my home by conning my elderly grandmother, whom I was taking care of, while I was out. She went in my room and went through my stuff (creepy), then found him napping on the couch and attacked him. My grandmother witnessed the whole thing. He grabbed her by the arms, forced her out the front door, and locked it. The cops were called again. They said they’d go and ‘talk’ to her.
The next day we were watching a movie and there was a knock at the door. The police had come to arrest him. She filed a complaint against him and shown off some bruises on her arms from the altercation that she swore were completely unprovoked. My grandmother saw the whole thing since she was in the living room too and testified on his behalf. He still ended up serving jail time.
No one takes male domestic violence victims seriously. They only see males as perpetrators.
Please, if you witness abuse, no matter WHO the recipient is, report it. If someone you know if being abused (not just physically - in any way) help them. Connect them to resources. Gender doesn’t matter in this case - no one deserves to be abused.
National Domestic Abuse Hotline
- Mod Dawes Sr.
Many of my followers know I run a somewhat-popular women’s blog for sexism-based violence. However, to me, recognizing male survivors/victims and women perpetrators is important as well.
Honestly, feminists need, need, NEED to recognize the existence of male survivors/victims and female perpetrators. Doing so breaks down the cliche of the “dominant male” and the “helpless woman” (not mutually exclusive) that are now important parts of the patriarchy that we want to break down. We want equality.
No abuser should go unpunished.
i’m very uncomfortable with people who don’t have about pages on their blog
what are you hiding
That I’m too lazy to write anything there, mostly
I am a wreck. I have no way to cope with loss, it’s driving me nuts. I have no idea what I’d do if I lost a human friend, I can barely handle losing a cat that was scared to death of me.